While I am the last to admit it, no person is perfect. I know it is a huge blow to some of us, me included. That being said anyone involved in the planning process is going to have to let go of some control. No one can be everywhere all the time. For some people it is easy, for others…it is a nightmare. Make some lists before you even pick up the phone. Sit down with some close friends and family for help with this one. Make lists of what your planning strengths and weaknesses. Ask your friends what they think about your lists and be prepared to cross some things off and put them on the other list. Don’t concentrate on which one is longer. This process is going to help you decide what you need to delegate for your own bridal sanity.

During the planning process a bride is bound to have friends and family who want to get involved. Some of them will feel entitled especially if they are financially bound to the event. Today there are no rules to a wedding, especially for young couples who are getting help from both sets of parents. I have noticed so many different funding situations that have emotional impact over the years. I have brides that pay for their entire wedding themselves, others who have some parental help from both sides, some have extended family financial funding and more along the more traditional line of the brides family funding the wedding. With financial funding come opinions and lots of suggestions. Suggestions can be a good thing, remember most of these people have been through this before and with experience comes wisdom. Most likely their style is not your style and addressing that in a polite response so not to offend anyone is tough-especially if it is your mother or your moher in law to be.

The following are a few guidelines that may be useful

• Give them tasks throughout the process and the day of.
• Be specific with what you want them to do. If you don’t want them making design decisions don’t give them that freedom.
• Include them in things like tastings and ask their opinion.
• Use open ended questions if you like their choices in general.
• If you don’t like their general choices give them A, B, or C option all of which are something that you can live with
• You have to be flexible.

At the end of the day this is only one day…I know, I know one really important day and I want it to be your perfect. But over your lifetime their will be more stressful things then making detail decisions about your wedding. Anyway the hard part is over, you found the guy (or girl).